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Wednesday
Jul262006

Smack

0144524669600.jpgA New Zealand Christian group has come out and said that not only should you belt your kids but that it's good for them, too. A ten to fifteen minute smacking session is the only way to discipline a child, they reckon. And as a public service they've produced a eight-page booklet on how to use physical punishment under the present New Zealand law. (read How not to leave a bruise)

The group Family Integrity has told parents that smacking can be a "10-to-15-minute process" and that if a child reacts angrily, such as by slamming doors or "pouting", they should be smacked again.

That's the ticket!

"Smacking is meant to drive the foolishness, the sinful manifestations, out of the child's personality so that they do not become permanent fixtures," it says.

They reckon smacking is justified because children younger than age eight "do not think straight" and "lack a developed sense of fair play and duty". (which they pick up later playing Rugby and shit)

The Family Integrity booklet, written by Craig "Smacker" Smith, says the Bible and section 59 of the Crimes Act allow parents to use reasonable force to discipline their children. (No fists, baseball bats or studded belts allowed)

Family Integrity says it is an informal group of families and individuals independent of any political party or church. The group believes "it is right and wise to bring our children up with loving corporal correction" and is opposed to "unjustifiable government interference" in family life.

Yeah...that's the way to go...smack the crap out of the little buggers - they've got to learn to leave the sheep alone.

I don't know why anyone is surprised about this. After all, the original name of the New Zealand national Rugby Team was The All Smacks. It's true. They got that name in the 1800's after delivering a right smacking to the English Rugby Team. The war chant - the famous All Smacks Haka was introduced soon after. Here are the words -

Ka Mate

Leader: Ringa pakia! Smack their botties!
Uma tiraha! smack them hard!
Turi whatia! they'll love you for it!
Hope whai ake! Let the hand follow through!
Waewae takahia kia kino! Smack them hard - as hard as you can!

Leader: Ka mate, ka mate smack 'em mate, smack 'em mate
Team: Ka ora, ka ora harder, harder
Leader: Ka mate, ka mate smack 'em mate, smack 'em mate
Team: Ka ora, ka ora harder, harder

All: Tēnei te tangata pūhuruhuru There is the man so hairy…
Nāna nei i tiki mai whakawhiti te rā …who took the Tiki and whacked the whities
Ā upane, ka upane oh the pain! what pain
Ā upane, ka upane oh the pain! what pain
Whiti te rā, hī! The sun shines out of his freckle!

Reader Comments (2)

THATS ALL FUCKN SHET THAT HAKA, WERE MAORI'S AND IT DOSENT MEAN THAT SO NEXT TIME WHY DONT YEW ACTUALY FIND OWT THE FACTS B4 COMING UP WITH SUM ATTA BULLSHIT!!!

AND BY THE WAY SMAKING IS ACTUALLY AGAINST THE LAW IN NEW ZEALAND SOOO SHAMMMMMMEEEEEZZZZ !!!!!

We interrupt this program with a commentary from our highly literate Kiwi cousins - who seem to have their Ugg Boots in a twist about something I've written here. Looks like they've left their sense of humour out in the sheep yard - the pair of thuckies. Say "sex" so we can all have a good laugh.
May 8, 2008 | Registered CommenterMalcolm Lambe

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