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Australian Rodent Exterminated - Finally

RATcp_old.gifOh happy day! Finally my fellow Australians have seen the light and totally rejected that pork-barreling, Bush arse-licking, Fifties timewarp excuse of a Prime Minister - little Johnny Howard. Not just rejected him but thoroughly humiliated the odious little toad, to the point where he has conceded defeat in his own electorate - the first Australian Prime Minister since 1929 to have done so. For what it's worth, here is his farewell speech (Hyacinth was heard to be sobbing in the background) -

"My fellow Australians, a few moments ago I telephoned Mr Kevin Rudd and I congratulated him and the Australian Labor Party on an emphatic victory.

"I wish him well in the task that he will undertake. We bequeath to him a nation that is stronger and prouder."

Hang on hang on...stronger and prouder? Proud of what? Proud that you believed the Bush and Blair bullshit and committed our troops to those two farces Iraq and Hashghanistan? Proud of your brutal anti-refugee stance? Proud of your utter neglect and contempt for the aborigines? Proud of your sorry GST - the one you said we'd never have? Proud of your six interest rate rises - again the ones you said we've never had. Proud of the Gunns Pulp Mill polluting the Tasmanian environment for the next Fifty years? Proud of the continued destruction of the world-heritage Tasmanian old-growth forests? Then let's not forget the Kyoto Agreement. Proud? He goes on -

"I've led a Government that has taken this country from deep debt to strong prosperity. I've led a Government that has never shirked the difficult decisions. I've led a Government that has reformed the Australian economy and left it the envy of the world."

Jesus what a bunch of twaddle that is. He inherited a freer economy that was instigated by the Hawke/Keating Labor Governments.

The Rodent continued with more bullshit -

"It's something that has really been the most unbelievable experience," he said. "The Australian people are the greatest people on earth and this is the greatest country on earth."

The Rodent thanked his family, colleagues and staff, particularly Deputy Leader Peter Costello, to whom he said "we owe a very special debt of gratitude".

"He's been a wonderful steward of the Australian economy and the future of our party is very much tied up with Peter Costello. He is very much our future."

Bullshit. It's over for him too. If anything it will be that so-called Environment Minister, Malcolm Turnbullshit (the one that brought us Gunns Pulp Mill) who'll be leading what's left of the Liberal Party.

The Rodent said he accepted responsibility for the election loss.

"I accept full responsibility for the Liberal Party campaign and I therefore accept full responsibility for the Coalition's defeat in this election campaign."

Thank you. Now fuck off.

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Reader Comments (1)


I am still working up the enthusiasm to enter into the post Howard blog era.

He and his buddies were so ugly. I am hopeful for a happier better Australia.

December 11, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterColin Campbell

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