Welcome to Wallyworld

Yeah, I know I've run this before but some of you haven't seen it and it's my blog so I can do what-the-fuck I like, Frank.

I’d been hanging around THIS BLOG for awhile. I started going there a year or so ago after a friend offered me a taste. I lurked for a time…occasionally commenting. But then something happened - I found myself avoiding friends and family to be with my blog mates – fingers, Smithee, Mountjoy, Chesty la Rue, Mrs J, WJ, Vic, Garry, Uncle Pervy and the gang.

I was hanging with this hard-core crew every weekday and sometimes even the weekend - 14 hours a day was not unusual. Reading every story and the comments. Constantly looking for updates and new posts. Taking my meals by the keyboard. I started losing weight. I wasn’t sleeping properly. My dog ran away with the bitch next door. My wife left me for a Luddite that hated computers and technology.

That’s when I realized I had a problem. That I had become addicted. That I was out of control. My life had become unmanageable. I couldn’t control my urges. It was obvious I needed help. So my best mate has taken me in hand and I’ve joined B.A. – Bloggers Anonymous - and I’ve taken The Pledge.

The 12 Suggested Steps of Bloggers Anonymous

1. We admitted we were powerless over Blogging – that our lives had become completely unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves would restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision NOT to turn our will and our lives over to Bill Gates & Steve Jobs.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves and it didn’t look good.

5. Admitted to the BLOG, to ourselves and to another human bean the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have the BLOG remove all these defects of character as long as it left us our email facilities.

7. Humbly asked the BLOG to remove our Site Password.

8. Made a list of all the persons we’d slagged off in the BLOG and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such geezers wherever possible, except for fingers ‘cause he’s a shit.

10. Continued to wake up to ourselves and stopped dropping a HYPERLINK all over the place just to impress the punters.

11. Sought through alcohol and all kinds of dope to improve our contact with the BLOG, and to get out a bit more without the laptop.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other Bloggers and to leave the bloody computer alone.